hey ( im gonna be aunt)

hey wazzup ???! 

last week i got some great news ., one of my best friends said she was pregnant last year in somewhere in november., jessica and and jennifer are my eminem to my proof.., they are my sisters and best friends
but jessica called me last week ., i was standing in the store and ive picked up the phone and she told me what she was getting boy or girl..im promised not to tell anyone ..,
but she said well auntie do you wanna know what im gettin and i totaly wanted to know..and she said it..
i almost started to cry ., im gonna be aunt for the 1st time.., so im exited.
for some this sounds dumb.,
but you must understand this..,
in life you get the blood related family and you get the family you make yourself .
and jennifer and jessica are my sisters., like i said they are my eminem to my proof..,
and i thank god for my sisters. and i thank god for my mother. my mom is like my dr.dre she saved me..,
she taught me what i know now..,
she taught me that i should follow my dreams and shoot for the stars.

and well the rest of the blood related family ,
a part of the family don't know eachother that good (like my uncle that lives in germany) i never get to see him or his kids( my nieces) thankgod for facebook cause i talk to em on facebook sometimes.
but the other have of my family pretend to like eachother but i think anytime this sh*t could really explode and we will have a jerry springer thing going on..
yeah things are not perfect ., it never is..

and i think that is why i started my own new family years ago..,
and my mom is the only one blood related that i truly love more then life it self..,
she is my rock..,
and jennifer and jessica are my non blood related family ., but to me they are family my real family.
but f*ck it im talkin more then i should LMAO
but im gonna be an aunt., and jennifer is gonna try to get a child to so im gonna be aunt twice.
god i realize how much we have grown up.
im 25 and i felt like a kid ., but each day im gettin out of that feelin and realizing that im a grown up...,

i realize it cause its time for me to move on from the past.,
its been stalkin me forever .,and im done with that..im still tryna run and hide from the demons of my past.
a past that i have not chosen .,
a past that i wanna leave behind..,
a past i wanna forgive and move on..
im not forgiving the people that caused me and my mom so much pain ( no i will not forgive their actions)
but i will forgive it for me..,
so they no longer have that hold on me..,
my inspiration is eminem song not afraid..,( that im listning now) LMAO
but tomorow im going to someone that can help me out..,
so i can start the futer..,
and so i can start new and fresh .
start the futer as a daughter , friend , sister , aunt, ME, NADIA

i will let u know how it went off cource.
but im out.!
ill be back


xoxox
much love and respect nadia